Monday, July 18, 2011

This is not a happy post.

I sit quiet and paralyzed in my room waiting for the thought to pass, stale air trapped in my lungs, tired limbs on the cold, hard marble floor, I attempt to whisper mantras about practicality.
But the thought refuses to pass. It stays..

..I stare at the ceiling, thinking about the number of graves I've dug myself; sloppy and poorly handled. There is a piece of my soul in every grave, and I think to myself how much I have in me, left to give. It’s funny, really…individually, how they almost mean nothing, just small messy holes with minuscule past regrets and failed attempts but then you stand outside of the box and get a nice aerial view,  you realize you’re looking at an entire field of loss; loss in dignity, respect, love, life, knowledge, trust and mostly, people.


I wonder before I die, if I will be empty.


P.s- This is my first attempt writing about my feelings and emotions. *gulp*
Next post, getting back on the randomness and awkwardness of my life.

P.p.s- I hate being sad. Good music can help me. Paaahleasee giveee.

16 comments:

  1. I can.not. write my feelings out. EVER. :(

    You want new playlist? Even I want! How to share?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Its so difficult no?

    playlists here -
    http://8tracks.com/fireinyoursoul/fairytale-dreams
    http://8tracks.com/guilty/the-list
    http://8tracks.com/solodolo5248/sing-me-to-sleep

    8tracks is music heaven. Troll there and you shall find great music =D

    ReplyDelete
  3. They're too sugar sweet for my liking. D:

    ReplyDelete
  4. I don't have anymore :s
    beautiful display image though. =]

    ReplyDelete
  5. Pandora's PoopJuly 18, 2011 at 12:22 PM

    Ok. Hi. Why you be sad and brooding? You is the random, stay the random. It is funner.

    Good musics, I don't have. But please don't die. And for that, don't dig another grave. Ok. Bye.

    Don't die. Eat choco pie.

    ReplyDelete
  6. WOW. Eat some Peaches. That would cheer you up.

    And Did I tell you that your Display picture is Chic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Cheers.=D

    ReplyDelete
  7. Ah. Loved the blog. Specially the blacky look.

    And seriously dont write about sadness loved the random posts more.

    Well you earned yourself a new reader.

    Cheers

    ReplyDelete
  8. Well. well, we have a writer in a grave digger, here.
    :)

    ReplyDelete
  9. :) here..there and everywhere.. amazing rants! Keep blogging.
    Cheers!

    ReplyDelete
  10. You have been awarded.
    Go check it out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Your number is (2)

    http://hamza-the-philosophaster.blogspot.com/2011/07/teenage-mutiny-oscars-last-part.html

    ReplyDelete
  11. Aww. I really loved this post. So, you have an emotional side too eh? Haha, jokes, listen to Double Vision- 3OH!3, Jet Lag - Simple Plan :D

    Btw, you've been awarded. Check out my latest post

    ReplyDelete
  12. PP- You be so nice, Whyyyyyy you be anon :(
    Will eat choco pie and be funner now. okaythanksbyeenow

    Hamza - Thanks for the award and the compliment :]
    I wish it only took a few peaches to cheer me up.

    Nia - Heyy. I loved your blog as well, will try and blogroll more often, if time permits.
    Thanks, see you around =D

    Holocaust Poet - Eeeh. But why does it sadness to make good writers :(
    But thanks. :D

    Ajay - thanks :)
    Your name rings a bell, do I know your from somewhere? Highly uncertain though.

    Asif - My emotional side is volcanic, I just keep it away from the blog. :p Will listen to the tracks soon.
    Thanks for the award. :D

    ReplyDelete
  13. Yes, I had the exact thought. It was the marble floor!

    Seriously though,I loved this, great writing
    indeed. Something to possibly steal from or just pledgerize for sure :)
    Crying With A Sense Of Human

    ReplyDelete
  14. Hah marble floors are something :D

    ReplyDelete
  15. Beautiful post, and so very true. It is very hard to lose someone you love, but it is something we all must face.
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    ReplyDelete
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